


Saudade

by flowerpillar



Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: 3rd year koga, M/M, i am only born to spread happy vibes, postgrad kaoru, the two aren’t together yet, there’s also some fluff??
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-30
Updated: 2019-05-30
Packaged: 2020-03-20 20:23:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,697
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18999865
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flowerpillar/pseuds/flowerpillar
Summary: Admitting that the Oogami Koga is feeling lonely when he is the only UNDEAD member in Yumenosaki is like admitting that he truly missed his senpais, which is something that he would rather not do for the sake of his pride.





	Saudade

**Author's Note:**

> i’m sorry i can’t do summaries

**Admitting that _the_ Oogami Koga is feeling lonely when he is the only UNDEAD member in Yumenosaki is like admitting that he truly missed his senpais, which is something that he would rather not do for the sake of his pride.** It is quiet nowadays, with no Sakuma Rei to argue with or Otogari Adonis to talk to, and especially having no Hakaze Kaoru to drag to practice. Adonis is still abroad, and the Operetta’s finished, hopefully seen or is being seen by his friend overseas.

How is he out there, though? They have regular calls to each other with Koga starting to deny his “lone wolf” persona, only keeping the wolf but the lone left forgotten. They discuss song ideas daily and the steps for their new dance for these said songs. Koga is doing solo for a moment, with the help of the student council president, in school and in that underground place where he first performed as a member of Deadmanz and the one that was previously managed by Kaoru.

”Yeah, yeah, I’ll be fine, Adonis!” The boy said to the person on the other line, a reassuring grin on his face as if the other man could see it. He heard a chuckle from Adonis from the other line. “Oogami, you really changed a lot.”

”I did?” _No, I don’t think that I did improve, Adonis_. Koga is currently alone in the room, with his classmates leaving one by one and Ritsu having to pet him on the head a few moments ago, still going on with the “Corgi” nickname he gave Koga. Koga is alone, so he could really let out a little bit of his voice. He did not have any scheduled lives for this week to focus on his studies, which was a relief to both Adonis and Koga. “Eh〜 that’s new. Where did I improve, Adonis?”

”You’re more open about your feelings and opinions compared to the previous year.” The other line said, straightforward for both of their own good. “You’re not one who would most likely create senseless noises nowadays, and would say things without no hesitation.” 

Koga assumed that he was finished speaking, compliments about what Adonis had said on the tip of his tongue before he heard the man add a “Except, perhaps, if it’s Sakuma-senpai we’re talking about.”

”Oh my god, Adonis, It’s not the time to talk about that old man!” A shaky laugh escaped from his mouth the moment he had said that, furiously wanting to deny his statement even though he is aware of it all. “He’s just so frail an’ old that he might collapse sooner or later when I won’t look out for him.”

”Pretty sure he enjoys talkin’ to me too when he’s free, he sounds so happy like someone who received his first puppy!” He continued, but paused when he heard some muffled noises from the other line, his unitmate’s voice being one of those. It sounds so urgent and quick, but Koga couldn’t make out since it seems like Adonis covered the area where the microphone is supposed to be. 

It only took mere seconds, maybe even longer? He isn’t sure. He’s been talking to Adonis for hours now that the sun is starting to set already. He didn’t even try to go to the Light Music Club room, knowing that both Aoi Yuuta and Aoi Hinata would not be there to greet him together with the previous club president. He just didn’t know why they became distant from him, and approaching them about it might be more painful than being ignorant about it.

Koga’s more surprised that none of the teachers barged in to his classroom to demand why he is still staying there, especially since this isn’t one of the rooms where you could reserve for a fee and be allowed to spend the night in. Well, he has no intention of staying at school during nighttime; if he did then who would feed Leon?

His surprise didn’t last long when he heard a couple of footsteps approaching his classroom, loud enough as if not caring on who would confront him about it or not. He only heard a “Sorry, Oogami they just needed some help from me awhile ago but to continue with the discussion—“ before Koga excused himself.

“Shit, gotta go.” It is a lot shorter than what Adonis what trying to say but he he can feel shame for it later. Right now.. where should he hide if it is a teacher who is currently checking every classroom to make sure that no one gets left behind? He couldn’t possibly say that he was talking to Adonis to a teacher, for they might scold him and mention that he can do it at home.

To be fair, he wanted to say that and when things went his way, he’s reply with “Sorry, sensei〜 Adonis’ voice is just so enchanting that you wouldn’t realize that time is flying by and you’re already breaking the rules” because it sounds like he is romantically attracted to him. 

The sound of the footsteps vanished, but Koga assumed that the person with loud shoes is already standing infront of the door. He immediately went to the far corner of the room, ducking behind a desk. Yes, he is friends with the student council president, but he knows that it would not help him if he was caught staying inside a classroom that late. 

“Wanchan〜!” The door suddenly opened, the familiar voice echoed loudly around the room that even Koga himself had to cover his mouth to refrain the yelp that was planning to escape. The graduated man entered the room without hesitation, as if he was made to enter the room unannounced. “Eh〜 how come Wanchan’s not here? The twins did say that I would find him here but perhaps they only serve Rei-kun〜?”

 _What the fuck?_ Koga couldn’t help but think, his face going out of its hiding place to get a good look at the visitor. It _is_ Hakaze Kaoru, born November 3rd and was a student of Yumenosaki, but what is he doing here, pacing around the room and looking behind every desk he passed by.

He does not seem to be looking for him behind those desks, despite what he announced earlier, so perhaps he could escape using the back door— “Ah! It’s Wanchan〜♡”

”Wanchan, c’mere, give your Kaoru-senpai a big, big hug!”

”Hakaze.. senpai, what the fuck do you want?” Koga asked, a bit harshly yes but he saw no change is Kaoru’s closed eye smile and his arms waiting for an embrace from him. He can’t say that he is tempted to go with the flow and hug him like he said, but he doubt that Kaoru would even expect him to hug him. Due with him living alone, physical contact with fellow humans are rare at home, and he did feel like he needed one right now; he just refrained himself from doing so.

Seeing that Koga didn’t approach him in any way, nor does he look like he was shoving him away, he walked to his direction and gave him the hug he wanted to give him as he buried his nose in the third year’s hair. It didn’t give off a smell of sweat like it would normally do, which made Kaoru worry a bit. In fact, it smelled a faint fragrance of mint?

Impossible, Kaoru would say. Koga not sweating when he passionately plays the guitar seems something that can’t happen, but did Koga play the guitar today? After all, he is seen alone inside a classroom, and the twins from the same club as him isn’t all updated with what Koga does nowadays. If Koga isn’t inside the clubroom, then what is he still doing here?

Notes are nowhere to be seen on top of his desk, only a phone and a few drops of something he couldn’t simply tell, so he couldn’t be studying. 

“Oi, flirty bastard, when are you letting go?” A voice suddenly snapped him out of his thoughts but he wanted to stay this way? He isn’t sure. Being with someone other than Rei and the people they met abroad is calming, or perhaps that was just the effect of Koga’s shampoo? “Hakaze.. senpai, I thought you didn’t like physical contact with boys. Let me go now.”

”You say that but you’re not resisting at all〜” Kaoru responded in a teasing manner, but nevertheless removed his hands from the other boy.  "So what makes you stay so late inside the school, with the chances of encountering one of the seven mysteries of the academy?" 

“Those mystery shit is mostly about Sagami-sensei, so there’s nothing to worry about.” Koga sighed, before he picked up the bag that was on the floor with the newfound wish to go home. Kaoru’s presence did shocked him a while ago, but he is quite relieved that he could still talk to Kaoru like this, as if the previous third years never graduated and Kaoru is still a student from Class 3-A. “So? What are you doing here?”

“Shouldn’t you be with Sakuma-senpai or something?” He added, refusing to look at him straight in the eye as he said it. No, it’s not really like he’s jealous of Rei having to be with Kaoru anytime.

He doesn’t even favor Kaoru much at the start, only tolerating him for the sake of unit activities and for that vampire bastard who suddenly made that flirt join UNDEAD. Perhaps he got more or less attached to Kaoru as the months pass by with being UNDEAD? That should do it, but he isn’t sure if it was enough excuse to the feeling of a stab in his heart when Rei talks about Kaoru with Koga feeling jealous of his respected senpai to be able to hang out with Kaoru.

”Me? With Rei-kun?” Kaoru repeated the question, as if it didn’t occur to him in the first place. “I’m always with Rei-kun, so why should I be with him even when we’re free from all the activities that we must accomplish?”

Koga only hummed in response before he heads out of the room, only looking back to lock the doors of the classroom as he was the one assigned to, before starting to walk all the way home. 

 

-

 

“..Hakaze what are you doing?”

”Walking my Wanchan home, what else should I be doing〜?”

Koga stopped in his tracks, only looking back to see Kaoru with a proud smile on his face as he looked back at Koga. The streets at night are still busy with life, with workers going here and there that it would be easy to lose sight of your companion if you don’t keep an eye on them.

Koga must admit that he admires Kaoru for being able to follow him in this situation.

”No, I mean what the fuck are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be abroad studying shit with that vampire bastard? Why are you even following me? It’s creepy stop it.” 

“Wanchan, Wanchan, how’s Corgi-cha— Leon?” Kaoru asked, trying to change the subject as he maintained eye contact on him. He watched Koga’s mood change, being more bitter compared to earlier. 

“He’s having troubles and won’t tell me something that could indicate what it was.” Koga admitted, his arms crossed and his gaze breaking his eye contact with Kaoru as he stared at the shop sign above them. Kaoru could tell that Koga’s not interested at all in the new arrival girl idol merch that the sign is saying, partly because he can’t see Koga listening to girl idol music at all unless their songs are rock styled.

“And you?” Koga’s gaze is back to Kaoru’s again, his eyes filled an emotion so dull, empty, eyes filled with something _that is not Koga at all_. He may appear surprised to Koga because of the conversation not going at the direction where he wanted it to be, and it’s all okay to him.

He does not want for Koga to know that he purposely took some time off just so he could ask how Koga is doing. Clearly, he can see that Koga looks like he’s dealing with something that bothers him. “And—and me? What about me?”

”Why you’re here, you bastard.” The third year let out a sigh, closing his eyes while doing so and when he opened them again Kaoru is surprised at how good he is to put a wall against the outside world from the emotions inside him. 

Excuse. Come up with an excuse, Hakaze Kaoru, you can do it. “I wanted to see Leon-chan, Koga-kun. Can I see Leon-chan?” 

 

-

 

Kaoru is relieved that some pictures were put around the apartment of the third year, the surprising number of pictures with UNDEAD on it being more than his childhood pictures. In fact, the only childhood picture Koga has framed to the wall is the first time they adopted Leon.  

The sound of tiny footsteps disrupted Kaoru who was looking so eagerly at the picture of him and Rei on their graduation day, with Koga and Adonis with their hands on their shoulders with huge grins on their faces. He saw the dog approaching them as Kaoru removed his outside shoes and he swore that he expected Leon to go for Koga, seeing that he is his owner and it’s natural for a dog to be attached to its owner.

He couldn’t express his joy and confusion combined when Leon pounced on him, catching him off balance with him licking Kaoru’s face ever so enthusiastically that even Koga himself spent his time to be surprised to.

”Leon-chan wait— Ahaha, not that- that tickles!” Kaoru playfully protested against the dog’s attempts to make Kaoru happier than he already is, being the sight that Koga really wanted to preserve in his mind. Immediately getting his phone from his pocket, he took a picture of the two of them with Kaoru being “Koga-kun〜 Help your senpai for a while, will you- Ah, Leon-chan wait wai—“

”Leon’s suddenly better,” Koga commented, crouching down to look at them more clearly now that Leon has calmed down. It still does not change the fact that Leon is still on top of Kaoru and is panting heavily. “So his reason why he was down because.. he missed someone like you?” He asked, not really directed to someone and continued to watch the both with eyes wide open. 

Despite this, Kaoru still answered. “I miss him too, you know. I’m glad our feelings are mutual〜” he said, arms suddenly placed around the dog and embraced him in a hug, smile not leaving his face. 

“Koga-kun, please join us too!” The man announced, one hand pulling Koga down with them taking the third year in surprise. “Hey youー! Get your hands off me!” Koga protested as Kaoru began to embrace Koga too, putting Leon between them but is careful not to put too much pressure to hurt him. 

“We are like a family, Koga-kun〜” Kaoru commented, putting his lips on the said male’s forehead and gave him a peck before realizing it.

Silence filled the air once everything sank in, the two boys having matching red faces with a happy pup between Kaoru's embracing arms. Both tried to open their mouth too, one to demand something and one to apologise for what happened. They stayed in the same position just for a few minutes, their eyes never leaving each other. 

The silence was only broken with Leon barking a bit loudly, before Koga stood up, his face still red. Kaoru watched them head for the apartment's kitchen before silently muttered to himself. "I did not just say that."

 

-

 

If truth really needs to be told, Kaoru's just here for his own free will, but also because he did worry how Koga is doing. He's aware that Adonis is not back from abroad so he can't fully perform as UNDEAD officially, and that the only clubmates he has are distant from him, according to Rei himself.

Sure, Koga has people like Ritsu and Mao that he could call "friends", but they're not exactly the people that he was with when he overcame hardships during his two years in highschool. Kaoru hoped that he could atleast make Koga's day a bit better with the presence of one of his unitmates, but according to the statement he let out awhile ago, he first doubted that he did.

Except, perhaps, that the glint in Koga's eyes had changed when Kaoru stared at them earlier while embracing the both of them with Leon. 

The color of joy and contentment filled his amber eyes, replacing the dull and empty hue it had earlier. Kaoru feels that that's what always occupies Koga's eyes the moment he comes home from school, so he just took that as normal. Even so, he takes credit for doing his job right, even if it's just for now.

"Hakaze.. senpai, where are you spending the night?"

"Huh?" The man looked up from his meal, his expression showing pure surprise as Koga brought his attention back to reality. He watched Koga sighed and placed the instant ramen that he cooked at the last minute aside, already done eating.

"I  _said_ , where are you spending the night? Would you go back to your family after eating dinner?" He repeated the question, eyes refusing to meet Kaoru's as they stared at the eating dog just beside him. "I mean, they'll accept you, right? Since you won't get family fights when one of the parties have been studying abroad, right?"

Ah, the idea of staying the night at someone's place had never visited Kaoru's mind at all when he came to visit Koga. He thought that he would be going to go to the airport once all businesses is said and done, flying his way back abroad before class starts the next day.

Looking back at the question, Kaoru wanted to answer that he indeed would want to spend the night here in Japan, but not with his family. The only people who would accept him would be his siblings, but he wouldn’t want to intrude on them just to leave early a few hours later. 

Who would he want to spend the night with, then? Perhaps Koga? No, no, Kaoru considers himself a heterosexual man despite comparing them to a real family just a few minutes ago. Atleast he thinks that he is, even though he finds Koga quite alluring. 

“I don’t think that I could sleep in Japan for tonight.” Kaoru said, playing with the chopsticks that he used to eat with. “I think Rei-kun already booked me a flight back to Italy, and he is generous enough for him to pay the fees.”

“Eh〜” was all that escaped Koga’s lips as he stood up and picked up the bowl where he used to eat his meal. “Well, make yourself at home before you go back, then.”

”I’ll just walk you to the trainstation  when you need to go, incase you have some shitty farewells hidden in your sleeve.” He added, getting a leash for Leon and ties it around his dog, making Kaoru confused. He only got an answer for the question that he didn’t know that he has when Koga called out from his bedroom. 

“You better hurry up and finish you meal, or else you’d have a hard time washing those dishes later.”

”Wash the dishes? But I’m your guest!”

”And Leon needs to walk around. Unless you want this ‘Corgi-chan’ to be unhealthy then do as I say.” Koga stated, walking out of his bedroom carrying Leon despite wearing the collar attached to the leash, his other hand throwing the keys for Kaoru to catch. “I’m not locking the door, so you could follow if you want to. The park’s not far, just near Yumenosaki.”

With a quick wave of goodbye, Leon and his owner exited their apartment, leaving Kaoru alone in a place he last visited when he was still a high school student. Following the boy’s instructions, he immediately finished his meal and washed the dishes in silence, except perhaps for the hums he made as he did so. 

He locked the apartment behind him, not bothering to take a peek on Koga’s room just to respect his privacy and went out to look for the boy. He was not wrong when he said that the park is more or less near, for he easily found it after getting lost a couple of times, some accidentally while some purposely as he stopped by a few shops to buy some souvenirs for his friend when he gets back abroad. 

He found Koga sitting on a bench, his eyes glued to the sky with a phone placed next to his ear. Leon is seen to be roaming the place, no leash and is constantly rolling around the grass, full of energy as if it’s morning. He heard Koga shouting for him to keep it down as it is already night before going back to talking with whoever he is talking to. 

Kaoru didn’t mean to sneak up to Koga, but he did walk quietly to his direction. He only caught a couple of “No, Adonis,” and a “Ahaha, yes that flirt did visit,” no more, no less. He was seen by the boy soon enough after he an “I don’t like _like_ him, what are you talking about?” with cheeks as red as the ones earlier. “Wh— What the fuck are you doing here? Sneaking up on me an’ all that? That’s fucking creepy as hell, you know!”

”Wanchan, keep your voice low, you’re hurting my precious ears.” Kaoru complained as he sat next to the boy, a little close if Koga could comment of that, and leaned to his direction. “Is that Adonis-kun? Can I say hello to Adonis-kun?”

”What are you, a child who doesn’t have a phone? Just call Sakuma-senpai or something, I reserved Adonis first.” Koga hissed, covering the spot where the microphone is located for a while before putting it again next to his ear.

Despite Koga obviously not putting it on speaker mode, he could clearly hear Adonis’ voice. Not that he meant to eardrop, since it it quite impossible when the phone’s facing your way, but he heard Adonis mention him from the other line. _Oogami, is that Hakaze-senpai I heard from awhile ago? Why don’t you tell him how—_

“Yeah, it is Hakaze-senpai, what about him?” He cut him off, eyes darting around only to rest on Kaoru’s then to Leon, then went back to Kaoru as if telling him something. Kaoru took this as a cue to go and play with Leon, which the dog gladly agreed to.

More minutes have passed, Koga still not dropping the call he has with Adonis and Leon getting sleepy already. Forget the term sleepy, he is already passed out on Kaoru’s lap as he continued to pet him. 

“No, Adonis I _told_ you that I don’t have any ‘feelings of infatuation’ or whatever you prefer to call it to  _Hakaze Kaoru-senpai_ , and even if I do I won't even tell him that I do have one!"

Kaoru's head snapped to the direction of Koga's voice, a loud laugh coming from his phone but his attention was mostly caught with Koga's statement. 

_Oogami, sorry, but even if you don't want to admit it and keep telling lies to yourself, then when you ever admit and when would he even know? Anyways, say hello to Hakaze-senpai for me, will you?_

_"_ Shit! Adonis, you sly ass motherfucker!" the boy cussed out, looking at the  _Call Ended_ flashed on the screen before furiously putting the device inside his pocket.

He then turned his eyes to Kaoru, his gaze hard and filled with frustration but none directed to the boy staring back at him with eyes as wide as saucers. "Oi, what's the time for your flight to leave Japan?"

Kaoru took a few seconds to comprehend everything that Koga said earlier and the question he asked just now, but it feels too much to sink in all at once. "A-about one in the morning? Hold on, Koga-kun, did he–"

"Well congratulations, motherfucker, I'll be taking you to a taxi instead or you'll be  _late as fuck_. Leave Leon to me and go get whatever baggage you may have from wherever you have kept them because you're going to miss your goddamn flight." Koga interrupted him, walking towards his direction just to carry Leon from Kaoru's lap. He also motioned Kaoru to get up and give him his keys, then sent him off before he can say anything else.

This was not how he expected his day to end. He swore to God this was just way unexpected that he didn't even imagine any of this to happen. Oh well, all's said and done and it was up to whoever up there to save his sorry ass from Rei's teases once Adonis tells him this.

"Koga-kun! One moment please!" The man panted, a bag hanging from his shoulder as he met up with him in the front of their apartmen building, Koga still carrying Leon with his snout on his shoulder. There's no vehicle infront of them yet, fortunate for Kaoru who wants to get things straight and unfortunate for Koga who knows that he is not straight. "What is it?" The boy asked him, not even sparing a glance to his senior.

"About– about what you said to Adonis-kun.. and what Adonis-kun said.."

"So that's why his voice was suddenly loud at the end." Koga commented, feigning wonder as he did so.

"So– so..."

"Hakaze, let's finish our studies and shit first before we discuss this kind of stuff, okay?" Ah, so he knows, but refuses to acknowledge it. He could see where Adonis meant with Koga not being entirely honest with himself with the proof of Koga wanting to evade the topic as fast as possible. "We still need to make UNDEAD the best unit out there, in professional standards when we graduate from school. Let's focus on that more, yeah?"

Still, it is unfair for Kaoru when he just wanted to confirm what Adonis had said straight from the one who could have those said feelings himself. He can't just ask Adonis if Koga really did like him, since he's not Koga and there's no way he can know what's going on in his head.

He could only sigh in defeat for now and agree to what he has to say. Even if he did receive Koga's feelings, there's no sure answer if he could give the answer that Koga would've wanted. Imagining Leon being sad too once Koga is upset would hurt, too.

Speaking of Leon.. Kaoru suddenly found himself ruffling through his bag which caught Koga's interest, looking for something that he bought a while ago when looking for things he could give to Rei. His fingers found the plush with a blonde mullet and pulled it out for both of them to see, Koga eyeing the plush, confused.

"For Leon-chan," he said, hoping it would explain it easily as he did some minor adjustments to the dog for the string of the plush to be hanging from his paw. "Incase he might miss a certain man called Hakaze Kaoru."

"Although I think the pictures in your home might be enough for him to remind of me."

"Hey!" Koga protested, his eyebrows furrowing, which Kaoru just laughed off.

"Wanchan, Hakaze-senpai would ju〜st be gone for a few months, so try not to bite anyone while I'm gone, okay?"

"I ain't following some orders from someone like you." The third year scowled, before noticing that the taxi that he called over from an app is approaching them already.

"Hehe〜 That's what I thought that you would say ☆" Kaoru placed his lips on Koga's forehead once again, giving him a quick kiss, leaving Koga dumbfounded. "Let's wait for a moment before thinking about things such as love, Koga-chan〜♪" 

**Author's Note:**

> the last scene looks like a husband leaving his spouse to go abroad hh


End file.
